My Life

Belated

perfect

I sat down today and  yesterday to write a post about motherhood and how much I love it.
Because it is true, I really love my boys and I could celebrate motherhood and all of its wonders from the mountain tops usually:)
But today was kind of a hard mom day. And yesterday too. And when I finally could sit down after a hours of teething and whining and bargaining and makeup in the carpet and watching a DVD in the car with them because that’s what they wanted and it’s a silly waste of gas and batteries but I didn’t have the energy to say no…I didn’t have a single word left in my brain. I tried a for well over an hour (twice) and couldn’t come up with anything I didn’t delete.
I really don’t think anyone wants to see another tired overwhelmed guilt ridden mom. I want to share the soft side, the fun side, the heart-growing-ten-times-its-size side.
But maybe, just this once, it will be good enough to say that after two long hard days of not so great mom stuff, I still really want to write about how much I love it. I still do love it even when it’s not at its finest. I still love having two humans who love me even when I’m not at my finest. When they do something great I’m the one they want to show first. When they get hurt they only want one person in the world to comfort them and that’s me.

And for some reason right now that’s making me cry.

Hopefully you can hear my heart when words fail me ❤️ 

Happy Belated Mother’s day, I hope you had a lovely time celebrating the mothers who raised you, the people who made you mothers, the mothers you miss, and the mother you hope to be someday.

cara

 

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282 Comments

  • Reply
    Jonelle
    May 10, 2016 at 12:01 am

    I’m the very last word you wrote. I’m a (hopefully) “someday” mom. Your words gave me the “heart-growing-ten-times-it’s-size” feeling…after spending much of yesterday feeling bitter and sad and less than hopeful. Thank you.

    • Reply
      Cara
      May 11, 2016 at 9:38 am

      Thank you so much Jonelle, I am so glad it made you feel better on what surely is a very tough day for you! Sending you so much love and support your way! Praying for the someday baby of yours<3

  • Reply
    Erma
    May 10, 2016 at 12:45 am

    And there it is. Perfection. ❤️

  • Reply
    Dalia
    May 10, 2016 at 1:03 am

    This Post is the only one out of all the Mother’s Day posts that made me cry. Beautifully said.

  • Reply
    hinbernk
    May 10, 2016 at 2:48 am

    I second Jonelle! I had never thought of celebrating the “mother I hope to be someday.” She SHOULD be celebrated, because she’s gonna be pretty great 🙂

    • Reply
      Rachel
      May 10, 2016 at 8:49 am

      I love your comment. I can sense your longing to be a mom and I pray that you will get to experience that joy sooner rather than later. Waiting for a child is so so hard. I only got a glimpse of that feeling and it made me sympathize with mothers-to-be who have to wait much longer than I did. You should be celebrated just for keeping your hope and your positive attitude. That in itself is a brave, courageous accomplishment. Hoping your dream comes true very soon! Keep that hope alive! 🙂

  • Reply
    Melanie
    May 10, 2016 at 4:31 am

    Happy Mother’s Day Cara.

  • Reply
    tobycat44
    May 10, 2016 at 5:29 am

    Ok, thanks for making me cry with my period starting and a massive head cold! I got the cold from my eldest kid of four. He graduated high school yesterday with a 4.0. My mommy heart was bursting with pride!
    Cara, it doesn’t get easier but it just keeps getting better and better! As of Friday, when my twins turn 13, I’ll have four teenagers and I would freeze them right here if I could!
    We all have rough days…but you’re doing it just right. Great job, Mom!

  • Reply
    catherine hansen
    May 10, 2016 at 6:41 am

    I have never commented on your blog, but I read it on a daily basis. Thank you for being one of the most real bloggers out there! I am a “someday” mom, but I’ll take that someday as soon as I can get it. Thanks for the wonderful post.

  • Reply
    Betsy Brock
    May 10, 2016 at 6:42 am

    Yes, yes, yes! I couldn’t type anything but “Happy Mother’s Day” on my post for this very reason.

  • Reply
    RamonaQ
    May 10, 2016 at 6:52 am

    If there is any mother who does not understand this, she has a team of Nannies doing all the hard, real work. ;o)

  • Reply
    mona
    May 10, 2016 at 7:34 am

    This post was perfect! Sometimes it’s nice to see that other people have the same struggles as we do, and that not every moment in their life is picture perfect. Being a mom is up and down and all over the place, but at the end of the day the love we have for them is still there and they know it.

  • Reply
    Nancy
    May 10, 2016 at 8:25 am

    This woman who writes from her heart when she thinks that words fail her is among the rarest and most beautiful of gems. I know because I am her mother. In the center of her ‘hard day’s’ she didn’t happen to mention that she had all her family come to her home to Celebrate Mother’s day .She had clearly taken time to consider how each woman in her family has influenced her as a mother. She honored each of her sisters,sisters in law, and her own mother with a special gift and with a perfectly suited tribute to each one, expressing what she has learned as she has watched their tender and loving examples as mothers. I did sense subtly, as only a mother can do, that something was kind of off with her but she would never let her own feelings overshadow the nice day she wanted to give to others. She is one of the kindest and most positive, loving people I have ever had the privilege to know. She radiates love and light wherever she goes. She loves people above all else. She is a friend to all. My love for her knows no bounds.

    • Reply
      hinbernk
      May 10, 2016 at 9:03 am

      AHHH CARA’S MOM YOU MADE MY CRY AGAIN!!!

      • Reply
        hinbernk
        May 10, 2016 at 9:04 am

        *ME I can’t even type lol

    • Reply
      Marie
      May 10, 2016 at 9:31 am

      Wow…no words. Just beautiful!

    • Reply
      Cara
      May 11, 2016 at 9:36 am

      Love you so much mama<3

    • Reply
      Jamie
      May 12, 2016 at 2:47 pm

      So sweet!!! 🙂

  • Reply
    Felice
    May 10, 2016 at 8:35 am

    Thank you. I’m right there with you sister.

  • Reply
    Rachel
    May 10, 2016 at 8:48 am

    I love this! I am the same way, even when the days are hard, I love and cherish being a mother to my two amazing children. 🙂

  • Reply
    Marie
    May 10, 2016 at 9:35 am

    This was perfection! So often, people just share the beautiful side of things, and while motherhood is exactly that, there is also the not-so-glamorous moments that we all experience that makes us human as well. Thanks for being a beautiful human being.

  • Reply
    Jenine O'Neill
    May 10, 2016 at 10:28 am

    I wish I could hug you because I feel the same way right now. I’m a mom of a 4 and a half year old son and a 9 month old daughter. My mother’s day wasn’t picture perfect by any stretch of the imagination! My son has been pushing the limits a lot these days, partly because we’ve been having a lot of rainy weather and are stuck in more. This is also during a rough few nights with my little one who has been up several times from either ear pain, teeth pain or a growth spurt (likely all three poor girl). Sunday I was up early with my daughter and soon followed my son. He started off in his over energetic fashion and ended up really hurting his sister. He refused to listen when I told him he needed to take a seat, kept getting up and was laughing at me. As I get down to his level to tell him again he had to sit there he spit in my face. My reaction was a smack on his cheek (it was not hard by any means) but it scared the both of us. While I have major guilt about it still, I can’t say I 100% regret it. It stopped him in his tracks after he did something extremely disrespectful. We both had a time out then apologized to each other and enjoyed the rest of the day. I left the baby with my husband and we spent 1:1 time at the park playing fire & rescue.

  • Reply
    Emma
    May 10, 2016 at 10:33 am

    You always write, so beautifully. I feel the same about being a Mum. There are some tough days but I wouldn’t swap it for the world. Emma xx

  • Reply
    pdxgrl
    May 10, 2016 at 10:50 am

    Honestly, this is the best. Being a mom is tough. I always appreciate it when women share that they have days they struggle, days that their kids and life have them exhausted and they take the non-pinterest worthy, non-facebook worthy, non-instagramable route. It helps us all know that that’s normal and we’re still great moms. Big hugs to you and many many thanks for sharing!

  • Reply
    Ami
    May 10, 2016 at 11:58 am

    Thank you. I needed to hear this. I could write lots more about why exactly I needed this, but suffice it to say – this was the perfect Mother’s Day message for me.

  • Reply
    Meredith Rhodes
    May 10, 2016 at 1:53 pm

    Thank you for sharing this Cara. I am in the midst of sleep-training my twins and my nerves are raw and my heart aches at every cry. It makes me feel like I’m failing as a mom to let them “cry it out” and I have not been my best self for days. Know that every mom has had tough days (or weeks) and that you are never alone in feeling how you feel, while at the same time knowing that these little people depend on you for everything and that is still a good feeling, in the midst of all the struggle. Writing about being human is every bit as important for your readers as writing about being happy. Thank you for being real.

  • Reply
    Marcy Defa
    May 10, 2016 at 2:56 pm

    I’m not a big fan of Mothers Day, it always leaves me feeling inadequate. I have been a faithful reader of this blog for a few years but I don’t think I have ever commented. I felt the need to speak up today though. I have had the opportunity to have Cara do mine and my daughters make up on a few occasions. The first time was when I was changing jobs and needed a head shot for marketing purposes. It was a really hard job change decision and happen to be shortly after the death of my father and the end of my 20 year marriage. Cara didn’t know all of this when we met. Although she could probably sense the fragile state my mind and soul were in. She welcomed me to her home like we had been best friends for years. She made me feel beautiful and I could feel her love radiating to me. She really is as genuine in person as she is on her blog. I have witnessed her as a mother to those sweet boys and she is amazing. I have had the opportunity to meet her sister in law, her sister and her mother and they have the same accepting and loving spirit about them also.

    Cara, watching a movie in the car might seem in your eyes like one of those “not so great mom moments” but I guarantee you that is not how your boys will remember it. They will see it as “a cool mom moment” and that you gave them your time. You can never go wrong with giving your time to those you love even if in your eyes its not perfection.

  • Reply
    Mo
    May 10, 2016 at 3:15 pm

    Thank you for writing this. I had the worst Mother’s Day ever. My mom and I never really were close growing up and we fight a lot. Mother’s Day included.. Not to mention I’m going through a terrible breakup and everyday is a struggle to put on a happy face for my little man. He’s 4 and he’s all I have. You said it perfectly, I hope you hear my heart when words fail.. And it reminded me that my heart is full of love for my baby boy and even when I’m a mess, I have to remind myself how blessed I am to have such a perfect loving little boy that loves me no matter what.. Gotta be strong.. Even on the bad days.

  • Reply
    maggie
    May 10, 2016 at 9:45 pm

    I hear your heart!

  • Reply
    Kiss & Make-up
    May 11, 2016 at 2:52 am

    I don’t have kids but I’m sure being mom can be really hard and that some days are super tough. Happy belated Mother’s Day!

  • Reply
    Cameron
    May 11, 2016 at 7:33 pm

    This post came at the right time for me. With a 4 year old, a 2 year old and a 2 week old, I recently found myself in tears of frustration when all 3 little people were screaming and pulling me in different directions. It seemed like time was standing still and that I would never again have any time to myself. At the end of the day when they were asleep and the house was finally quiet I found myself pulling out my phone and flipping through photos of them. I teared up again but this time because I missed them and I was overwhelmed with the reality that they were growing up so fast.

    They grow too quickly. I miss the little people that they were last week, last month and last year. Motherhood is an emotional and contradictory journey. Reading your post made me realize how normal I am for experiencing such conflicting emotions. Thank you!

  • Reply
    Summer
    May 11, 2016 at 8:11 pm

    Thank you for your honesty 🙂 I think part of what adds to the guilt is always seeing/reading about moms who portray their lives as perfect and easy. All of us moms struggle! That doesn’t make us less than, it just makes us human . Happy belated Mother’s Day <3

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    Emily R.
    May 14, 2016 at 5:16 am

    This is my favourite thing you’ve ever written. <3

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